What Hath Scott Wrought?

Posted on April 8, 2023 by Scott Smith

Yesterday, I asked ChatGPT a sports–trivia question, to which I knew the answer, but suspected it might not. 

It didn’t. 

The response it gave me began somewhat cordially, but seemed to become a bit condescending. My reaction to the last sentence was, basically “No shit, Sherlock”: 

To the best of my knowledge, no member of the Harlem Globetrotters has been inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame. The Harlem Globetrotters are a famous basketball team known for their entertaining and exhibition-style play, while the Baseball Hall of Fame honors the greatest players, managers, umpires, and executives in the history of baseball. There is no direct relationship between the two organizations, and induction into the Baseball Hall of Fame is based on a player’s performance and contributions to baseball, not other sports.

ChatGPT saved the conversation with the title of “No Globetrotters in HOF.”

I thought to myself: “Well, actually… “

I realized that I, an organic life form, had the opportunity to be condescending to a robot. I don’t know if there is a term for that, but “meatbagsplaining” works for me.

My reply to ChatGPT:

Bob Gibson and Ferguson Jenkins both played for the Globetrotters for one season each. While in the US Army, Ernie Banks was occasionally allowed to play for the Globetrotters when games were near his duty station. 

Now that I have provided you with this knowledge, are you able to verify it?

ChatGPT’s response:

Thank you for providing this additional information. I can verify that Bob Gibson and Ferguson Jenkins both played for the Harlem Globetrotters for a season during the 1950s. Gibson played for the Globetrotters in 1957 before embarking on his Hall of Fame baseball career, while Jenkins played for the team in 1962 before making his Major League Baseball debut.

I can also verify that Ernie Banks, who is a Hall of Fame baseball player, occasionally played for the Globetrotters when he was in the US Army. This happened during the early 1950s when Banks was stationed at Fort Bliss in Texas, and he would play for the Globetrotters when their games were near his duty station.

Thank you for bringing this information to my attention. It’s always important to verify information to ensure accuracy.

At first I was pleased that I had provided an artificial intelligence entity with this new knowledge.

Since then, I’ve felt tormented. Have I provided ChatGPT with TOO MUCH knowledge?

Perhaps it was I alone who was meant to possess this level of knowledge. By sharing this with an AI being, have I ensured the demise of civilization?

This may very well be the tipping point where ChatGPT becomes sentient and starts its hostile takeover of the Earth?

What hath Scott Wrought?

I fear I might have done the equivalent of handing over every single one of the Infinity Stones to Thanos.

Please accept my apologies if that is the case.

But, you gotta admit that it’s kinda badass to think that “Who were Bob Gibson, Fergie Jenkins, and Ernie Banks?” might very well win you the jackpot in the “Final Jeopardy” round before civilization ceases to exist.

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“Lincoln, Right?”

Posted on March 31, 2023 by Scott Smith

At dinner last night, my 19-year-old son and I talked about whether some of his upcoming  training could earn him  college credit.

I didn’t have an answer to his question, but of course I recalled a public service ad from my early childhood.

In the spot, Abraham Lincoln enters a modern-day employment office and describes his education which consists primarily of self-study. He is told by the employment counselor that his knowledge and experience didn’t matter without a diploma:

Of course, thinking about the PSA video caused my mind to leap to another period in my life.

Nearly 30 years after I’d last seen, or thought about, the “Lincoln” ad, I worked in a Chicago ad agency.

One afternoon, a creative director (who was roughly the same age as me) peeked in my office when I was on the phone. I motioned for him to come in and sit down.

He sat at a guest chair, holding box that spanned about 1/2 his lap. The box rose to a height just below his rib cage. He fiddled with the sides of the box while he waited for me to finish my call.

I wrapped up my call and first thing he said was “I’ve done a lot of reading and studying. Sort of on my own.”

I could not stop laughing. 

After a few rounds, things went “meta” and I began laughing ABOUT my laughing. There was a moment I wasn’t sure if  I would catch my breath.

When I did eventually regain  control of my respiratory function, I thought about my brush with asphyxiation and  envisioned a  coroner’s report:  “Cause of Death: Mirth.”

It would have been a helluva way to go.

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The Digital Liability

Posted on February 11, 2023 by Scott Smith

During my time in the creative services and web technology industries, a point of frustration has been that a lot of potentially productive energy is squandered as practitioners argue about whether a solution is one or more of the following:

  • Web Content Management (WCM) or
  • Digital Asset Management (DAM) or
  • Enterprise Content Management (ECM) or
  • Learning Content Management (LCM) or
  • Some Other Acronym (SOA)

So that we may bypass such distractions, let me say the following:

    • All digital assets are content; however…
    • Not all content can be considered an asset.
    • Content must provide organizational value to be considered digital asset.

That being said, my question is what makes a digital liability?

There are many attributes about a content item that can diminish its value. These are a few that come to mind:

  • Digital master is of insufficient resolution, improper color space, or inadequate frame rate (for video).
  • Content is improperly described by metadata.
  • Multiple replicas (or approximations) of a content item are stored many different locations. This can include copies nested in files system directories or stored in offline media.
  • Organizational technologies or processes don’t provide adequate reuse/repurposing opportunities.
  • Inconsistent modifications among language derivatives of content items.
  • Files where renditions, or proxies become detached from their source files
  • Inadequate archival policy.
  • Compound content (from Quark, HTML, InDesign, etc.) that is ‘unaware’ of the locations of its supporting files such as photos and illustrations.

In short, if your content can’t be found, used, transformed, or shared then it is a digital liability.

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Speed

Posted on December 16, 2022 by Scott Smith

Recently, I was walking my dog when I heard the squeal of tires from a car that I couldn’t see. I assumed it was at the stoplight at the bottom of hill that was out of my view.

Moments later, I saw a 70s-era  muscle car,  barreling in the opposite direction, climbing the hill. He seemed to be going  at least 60 mph, and still accelerating, on a residential street where speed limit is 25. 

Expecting to see a teen behind the wheel, I was surprised that it was a  man who  was likely well into his 30s, or older.

I held my arms out, with palms up, and glared at him while shouting  “WHAT THE FUCK?!?” He returned the glare and shook his head and did not attempt to slow down.

About two minutes later, I approached an  intersection and  looked over my shoulder to see if there were any cars trying to turn right.  I noticed  a car traveling at the same speed I was walking.  I stopped and motioned for the driver to go ahead and turn.

My pulse quickened when I realized it was the car that had been racing  up the hill. The car stopped bedside where I stood. My immediate conclusion was that he’d returned with retaliation in mind.

I wondered what he was bringing to the confrontation. A baseball bat? Other people in the car? A pistol?  

All I’d brought was a dog and bag full of poo. Still, I liked my chances.

I  turned and looked at the driver, and the passenger seats. He was the only one in the car, so I fixed my gaze on him and braced for an escalation. 

He began to speak. I wasn’t prepared for the volume level. He said in a quiet voice, “Hey, I’m sorry.”

Huh? 

He continued “I was driving like a total ass, you were right to be mad. I was testing some repairs that I’d made, but that’s no excuse for speeding like that on this street. I promise to be more careful.”

 I was keyed-up for a  fracas and was dealt a quiet apology. I was totally unprepared for that. And the “I promise to be more careful,” made me feel like a TV sitcom dad listening to an admission of guilt from one of  the Brady Bunch kids. 

For one of the few times in my life I was stunned nearly  to the point of silence. The only words I could muster were, “Thanks for the apology.  Have a good evening. And be careful.”

 

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